With our first baby, my husband once said, "I had no idea so much gross could come out of something so small!"
It's true - it seems like babies are a factory of grossness. They somehow manage to always puke, poop, and get the hiccups at the same time - and particularly right after they have had a bath or you have finally changed them into that perfectly cute outfit for the day!
Don't get me wrong - even with all of the gross, babies are still the sweetest thing ever, (particularly MY babies)! However, all the cute has to be there to balance the projectile body fluids.
With our first son, it was an explosive poo that managed to shoot all over my unsuspecting self in the wee hours of the morning on my husband's first day back to work. Talk about trial by fire into the whole parenting thing! My husband's immediate response was gagging - followed by a demand that I shower immediately.
Second son, a similar experience occurred - although this time I was ready with a diaper wipe to at least deflect the explosion away from myself. I still had to get up in the middle of the night to change sheets, wash baby, etc etc.....
Fast forward almost four years to our now THIRD baby (yes - we are gluttons for punishment), and the infamous baby poo explosion strikes again! After playing musical beds between my own bed and my needy almost four year old's need to "nuggle" aka snuggle in the middle of the night last night, I was more than a little tired. I started to change sweet baby number three and as soon as the wet diaper came off she started to pee -- in my delusional exhausted haze, I grabbed the diaper I had waiting hoping to keep the bed and myself safe from whatever else was to come -- "Not this time!" I thought to myself with pride.
Apparently, pride comes before the......poo.......YUP.....unfortunately, she wasn't done working on her diaper before I changed her -- and the diaper I had skillfully put in place to stop the mess? Yes - it was inside out -- the NON-absorbent side up against sweet princess.
At this point, I just resigned to the fact that the mess was everywhere - the sheets of my bed were wet - her night clothes were soaked - my clothes were dirty, and she needed a full bath.
Husband asked what was happening - and then proceeded to roll over and go back to sleep on his warm, dry and clean side of the bed (read: third time parent!). What was I to do?? What any good, self respecting exhausted parent does........get a clean towel - place it over the mess on my side of the bed - give baby a quick (but thorough) wipe bath - and then change beds to try to catch another wink of sleep before the day begins.
Baby Poo 3 -- Mommy 0